SHARING WHY I WRITE NOVELS - 8

WHY I WRITE NOVELS – 8 I once had a morbid fear of making a mistake – of being wrong. My fear was so intense I would often not try to do or say something for fear of failure. When circumstances forced me to risk, my whole body would shake violently; if I didn’t get to a toilet fast enough I’d pee on myself - I’ve often used paper towels to absorb the wetness from the front of my pants to get rid of the stain. I was and am a physically active person – I had and still have the body of an athlete. As a young person I had an athletic body but not the confidence to compete successfully – I was scared of not making the basket, not jumping high enough, not catching the ball, not hitting the ball, not running fast enough, I was scared of looking like a fool in front of my peers. With my fear I created a self-fulfilling prophecy. I thought I’d fail and I did; I thought I’d look like a fool and I did. The one redeeming quality I had and still have is I NEVER STOPPED TRYING TO MAKE THE SHOT, NEVER STOPPED TRYING TO CATCH THE BALL, NEVER STOPPED GETTING UP, I NEVER STOPPED GETTING BACK IN THE GAME. Along the road to becoming an adult I learned that failure is a part of any success. There is no success without some failure. Along the road to maturity I learned that I had created prophesy to fail – I learned to use that same energy and created prophesy to succeed. This insight didn’t come out of the blue – it came from learning to think, it came from reading many books out of many disciplines. www.adolphusward.net